Listening first has shaped everything I do. I was a radio engineer for my entire career.

Early in my career, I learned that being able to explain technology wasn’t nearly as important as being able to listen. Like many technical people, I could easily talk about systems, networks, settings, and specifications. The problem was that most people didn’t call because they wanted a technical lesson. They called because something wasn’t working and they needed help.

I discovered that if I started speaking “tech,” I’d often lose my audience.

So I changed my approach. Today, when someone contacts me, I start by listening. I want to understand what’s happening, what they’ve already tried, and what concerns them most.

I take notes.
I ask questions.

I look for patterns.

Then I explain the situation in plain language and provide practical options. I don’t believe in dragging people along or making them feel dependent on me. I don’t believe in talking over someone’s head just because I can.

The person asking for help should always feel comfortable, informed, and in control of the process. My role is not to tell you what to do. My role is to help you understand your options so you can decide what’s best for you, your family, and your budget.

I think that’s the respectful way to help people, and it’s the approach I’ve tried to follow throughout my career.